How to Dress Appropriately to a Wedding as a Guest

Some years back, I attended a friend’s wedding at St.Regis. The ballroom was all chandeliers and Chiavari chairs, the kind of setting where even the water tasted more expensive. I had come in a crisp button-down and khaki trousers, thinking I looked quite decent — until I noticed the other guests in suits and cocktail dresses.

One glance from the bride’s mother told me I had misread the assignment.

We all want to look good at weddings — but not too good and definitely not off-brand. So here’s your friendly Singaporean uncle’s guide on dressing right, respecting the couple and still walking into the banquet with quiet confidence.

🎯 First, Know the Dress Code (If There Is One)

• Black Tie [52. What does ‘black-tie’ mean in a wedding invite?]: Think tuxedos, floor-length gowns, and red-carpet-level polish.
• Formal / Semi-formal: Suit and tie for men, cocktail or midi dresses for ladies. No jeans, no polos.
• Smart Casual: Long-sleeved shirt and trousers (no berms). Ladies, a nice sundress or a flowy top with a skirt is good.
• Casual: Even if the vibe is relaxed (like a beach solemnisation), no slippers, singlets, or shorts, please.

Pro tip: If there’s no dress code, err on the side of dressy. Overdressed > underdressed, especially when someone’s spending thousands to feed you scallops and panna cotta.

👔 For the Gentlemen

• Shirts: Long-sleeved button-downs are safest. You can roll the sleeves up after the solemnisation.
• Trousers: Well-cut chinos or dark dress pants. No jeans unless the couple’s having a hipster rooftop wedding [40.Hotel Banquet or Garden Solemnization?].
• Shoes: Loafers or leather shoes. No Crocs. Not even the ones you THINK look nice.
• Jackets/Blazers: Bring one if the wedding’s in a hotel or air-conditioned space — it pulls your look together and makes your post-banquet photos look 20% sharper.

• Loud prints (unless the invite says “tropical chic”)
• Wearing all-black (save it for funerals)
• Shorts. Just… don’t.

👗 For the Ladies

• Dresses: Midi or knee-length cocktail dresses work for most weddings here. Save full-on ball gowns for evening black-tie affairs.
• Colours: Avoid white — let the bride shine. Red is often okay unless it’s a traditional Chinese wedding (check with the couple). Pastels, floral prints, jewel tones? Always a safe bet.
• Footwear: Heels are classic, but stylish flats or kitten heels work too — especially for outdoor weddings on grass.
• • Accessories: Keep it elegant. And bring a shawl or light cardigan — hotel air-con can be arctic.

• Super plunging necklines or ultra-mini dresses (there’s sexy, then there’s clubbing — know the line)
• Denim jackets or sneakers unless it’s a very casual setting
• Loud sequins in the morning. Save your disco ball energy for dinner.

🧧 Bonus: Cultural Sensitivities

• Chinese weddings: White is sometimes associated with mourning — so it’s best left out, especially if you’re unsure. Red is traditionally for the bride, so go for softer hues unless you’re close to the couple.
• Malay weddings: Modesty is key. Ladies, consider covering your shoulders and knees. Men, avoid overly tight shirts.
• Indian weddings: Bright colours are celebrated — but don’t wear all red or gold unless invited to do so. Those are usually reserved for the bride.

If in doubt? Ask. Couples would rather you clarify than accidentally show up in something awkward.

💬 Final Thoughts from Uncle Bobby

Dressing right for a wedding isn’t just about looking good — it’s about showing the couple you care enough to make the effort. You don’t have to break the bank or dress like you’re auditioning for Crazy Rich Asians. Just aim for neat, respectful and occasion-appropriate.

And remember: If you’re planning to take 73 selfies at the reception, do the couple a favour and make sure you’re dressed in something they won’t cringe at in 10 years’ time.